Why Is Tracking My Spending So Hard With ADHD And What You Should Do Instead?
You know what you're “supposed” to do.
To be good with your money you need to check you accounts all the time and track every transaction, right? That’s the only way to stay on top of things and be responsible, right? That’s what all the experts say.
You know you're not stupid. You manage complex projects in your business or at work. You organize everyone else's life. You can put out fires, see the fires coming before anyone else does, you can coordinate schedules for other people, and solve problems that would break other people.
But when it comes to being on top of your money??
You can't seem to make it stick. 😫
And then the negative thoughts, and shame spiral start when you overdraft your account, miss a bill, or tap your card and it’s denied! You wonder: What is wrong with me? Why can't I do this one basic thing?
Here's what I need you to hear before we go any further.
You are not broken.
You are not lazy.
You are not failing at being an adult.
The system you've been told to use? It was never designed for your brain.
The Part Nobody Talks About: The Shame
Let's be honest about what tracking spending actually feels like when you have ADHD.
It's not just inconvenient. It's emotionally exhausting.
Every time you log in to check your account, you're bracing yourself. Is it overdrawn? Did I forget something? Oh god, what did I spend money on?
And if you've been avoiding it for a while, the fear gets worse. More transactions. More accounts. More "where the hell do I even start" energy.
If someone has tried to help you before, maybe a family member or a financial advisor, you've probably heard:
"Just track everything."
"Why don't you just check your account?"
"It's not that hard."
And they mean well. They really do. But that condescending tone, that assumption that you're just not trying hard enough, it lands like a throat punch.
Because you ARE trying. You've tried so many times that it’s a constant drain.
You're just tired of systems that don't account for how your brain actually works.
Why Tracking Every Dollar Doesn't Work For ADHD Brains
Here's the thing people don't get: tracking spending isn't one simple habit.
It's actually twenty tiny tasks hiding inside a trench coat pretending to be one task.
You have to:
Remember to do it
Find the login
Reset the password (because of course it expired)
Deal with two factor authentication
Open multiple accounts
Categorize transactions
Decide where things should go
Remember what that random charge even was
Check how much you’ve spent and compare it to your budget
Do it all again tomorrow, and again, and again, until the end of time
And if you miss a few days? The data gets messy.
Miss a few weeks? It feels pointless to restart.
Miss a few months? You feel like you've failed completely.
ADHD brains do better with systems that still work even when you're inconsistent (because you will be).
Tracking only works if you do it constantly. That's not a bug in your brain. That's a design flaw in the system.
The Knowledge Gap Isn't Your Problem
You already know what you're supposed to do.
Spend less than you make. Save money. Don't impulse buy. Check your account regularly.
You. Already. Know.
The problem isn't knowledge. It's implementation.
And here's what makes this so frustrating: you can probably help other people with their money, their organization, their planning. You're good at seeing solutions for everyone else.
But when it comes to your own finances? Your brain just... shuts down.
That's not laziness. That's not a character flaw.
That's your brain protecting you from something that feels overwhelming and emotionally unsafe.
What Actually Happens When You Try To Track Spending
You decide you're going to start fresh. New app. New spreadsheet. New system. This time will be different.
You do it for a few days. Maybe a week if you're really motivated.
And then:
Life gets busy
You forget one day
That one day becomes three days
You feel guilty about the gap
Checking now means facing what you've been avoiding
So you avoid it longer
The guilt compounds
You tell yourself you'll just start over next month
This isn't failure. This is a completely predictable response to a system that requires constant executive function for something your brain finds boring, detail heavy, and emotionally triggering.
The Fear Nobody Mentions
Here's what I hear from clients all the time:
"I'm terrified I'm going to be in debt forever."
"What if something happens and I can't take care of my family?"
"I make good money. There's no reason I should be living paycheck to paycheck."
"I can save money, but then I just... spend it. And I don't even know where it goes."
The fear is real. The stakes feel high. And that makes the avoidance worse.
Because if you don't look, you don't have to face how bad it might be.
But also, if you don't look, you can't fix it.
That's the very shitty trap we get stuck in when we have ADHD!
Here's What Actually Works: Stop Trying To Track Everything
I'm going to say something that might feel like it’s the missing piece of the money puzzle for you.
You don't have to track every single dollar. 🤯
Seriously.
There is another way to manage money that works way better for ADHD brains.
Instead of tracking every dollar after you spend it, you build a system that does most of the work before you spend it.
Less tracking.
Less guilt.
Less decision fatigue.
More clarity about what's actually safe to spend, without all the mental math.
The One Change That Makes Everything Easier
If you take one thing from this blog, let it be this:
Stop trying to control spending inside one bank account!
When bills and spending live together in the same place, everything feels urgent, stressful, and chaotic!
You're constantly doing mental gymnastics to figure out things like: Can I afford this coffee? What bills are coming out? Did I forget something? Am I going to overdraft my account?
That's constantly fucking exhausting!
The key: Separate where your spending happens.
Your main account becomes your bills and stability hub. The money for rent, utilities, loan payments. The essentials that keep your life running that are more predictable (even though some, like utilities may vary).
Your everyday spending happens somewhere else:
The ideal option: A separate spending account
A decent second choice if most of your spending is in-person: Cash
An option on for a limited number of ADHDers (like those that are better with rules like AuDHDers): A credit card used only for spending, that gets paid off in full at least every pay day
When you move money on purpose into your spending account, you already know it's safe to spend (having an overall plan for your money can give you confidence with how much you can move there).
You're not tracking. You're not doing mental math. You're not second guessing every purchase.
You're spending money you already decided was okay to spend.
What This Looks Like In Real Life
Main Account:
Bills, fixed expenses, the money that keeps your life stable, AND your income deposits here and your transfer to your spending account also happen in this account
Spending Account:
Day to day purchases, fun money, the stuff that makes life worth living, like gas, takeout, coffee, groceries and entertainment.
Here's what changes:
Before, you'd buy coffee and think: Can I afford this? What's coming out? Am I forgetting something? Ugh, I should check my account. But I don't want to. I'll just... hope it's fine.
After, you buy coffee and think: This money is in my spending account. I moved it here on purpose. I'm good.
That's it.
No tracking. No guilt. No mental gymnastics.
But What About The Details?
"Okay, but how much should I move to spending?"
"What if I run out before payday?"
"What about irregular expenses?"
Valid questions. And they have answers.
The amount you move depends on your income, your bills, and what you actually spend on average. (This is where my free ADHD Money Starter Kit or one-on-one financial coaching helps, because we figure out YOUR numbers, not some generic budget someone else made up.)
If you run out before payday, that's data. Not failure. Data. You either need to move more, or you need to look at where it's going and decide what to adjust.
Irregular expenses get their own plan. Maybe you set aside a bit each pay cycle. Maybe you have a separate savings bucket. It depends on what works for YOUR brain and YOUR life. This is probably a great subject for another article!
With all things money there's no one right answer. There's only what actually works for you.
Small Actions You Can Take This Week
Start here. Not everything. Just one.
Open one separate spending account
Automate $ transferring to this account each pay cycle and see how it feels to spend without guilt.Try a cash category
Pull out cash for one thing: groceries, fun money, or eating out. When it's gone, it's gone. No tracking required.Turn on autopay for one bill
Reduce future mental load. One less thing to remember. One less thing to avoid.Set a 10 minute weekly money check in
Not tracking. Just checking balances. "Do I have what I need? Is anything weird?" That's it.Stop beating yourself up
Seriously. The shame is not helping. You're doing your best with a system that wasn't built for you.
You're Not Failing. The System Just Doesn't Fit Your Brain.
Tracking every dollar works for some people.
But for ADHD brains, it often creates more stress, more shame, and more avoidance.
You don't need more discipline.
You don't need to try harder.
You need better design.
When your system reduces decisions, reduces emotional friction, and protects your essentials automatically, everything starts to feel more doable. You begin to feel like change is possible for you. ♥️
Not perfect.
Not overnight.
But doable.
And doable is where change actually lives.
What If You Need Help Figuring This Out?
If you're reading this and thinking, "Okay, this makes sense, but I have no idea how to set this up for MY life," you're not alone.
That's literally the work I do with clients.
We build money systems that fit your brain, your life, and your values. No shame. No rigid rules. No pretending you're someone you're not.
And here's what I know for sure: you are absolutely capable of building a system that works for you and my brain starts to learn about you and your money challenges and build a puzzle of what I think will work. I can’t explain it, but it just starts to click!
You just need someone who gets how your brain works and won't make you feel like shit for struggling with something that's genuinely hard.
Want to start on your own first? My free ADHD Money Starter Kit can help you map this out step by step and get clarity on your numbers without the overwhelm.
Ready to talk about coaching? Book a free consultation and let's figure out what a money system that actually works for YOUR brain would look like.
Want to dive deeper into ADHD and money? Check out my post on Paying Your Bills On Time With ADHD for more strategies that actually work.
Remember: Tracking every dollar is not the only way to be good with money.
And you are not broken for struggling with systems that were never designed for how your brain works.
